Recently I came across a podcast about giving a heartfelt apology. Completely agreed with all 9 rules starting with Rule #1 which is to keep your "but" out of the apology. I have been thinking about this for a few days now..who are the people that I need to apologize to and who are the people that I would like an apology from. The ones I need to apologize to...I can't think of anyone...I am sure I have offended people in my 40 some years...I just don't remember it. On the other hand I know exactly who I want an apology from. But just as I don't remember who I have hurt, I am sure they too would not remember that they have hurt me so deeply. So what's the solution to this? Should I ask each of my close friends if I have hurt them and then apologize? But then if I don't remember what happened, is the apology meaningful? After all a true apology recognizes how you have failed the other person. Similarly do I tell the people, some of whom I am still friends with, how they have hurt my feelings? Same problem applies. How do you forgive someone when they don't ask for it? This podcast really brought forth all the hurt from many years from some old friends. I will just have to carry this burden with me because just like I will never get to apologize to people I have offended because I don't remember it, neither will my friends (or ex friends). But I do want absolution from my forgotten transgressions and an apology for theirs. I will get neither. I will just have to settle for thinking of this as an even trade.
No comments:
Post a Comment